The Ourea were primordial mountain nymph, but they weren’t youthful, slender, nymph like figures. They looked like old men of the mountain. There were ten, Aitna, Athos, Helikon, Kithairon, Nysos, Olympus 1, Olympus 2, Oreios, Parnes, and Tmolus, each belonging to their own mountain region. For the most part, the Ourea were children of Gaia that she made…without assistance. The exception to this was Tmolus.

Tmolus was a son of Ares and Theogone. As a mountain, he was considered as old and wise as the hills. When Pan and Apollo had their musical duel (think The Devil Went Down to Georgia. Pan foolishly challenged Apollo to a duel and they each brought along followers to listen. First Pan played and the tune was so lively, that forest creatures frolicked and danced along. It was like one of the cutesy, disney side-kick songs.

Then Apollo played the divine equivalent of Let it Go with his lyre and the earth held its breath in wonder until the last note faded into the cosmos. All the votes went to Apollo, except for Pan’s follower Midas. As a reward for his stupidity, Midas was given the ears of a donkey so no one would take his opinion seriously anymore.

Oceanus was the divine personification of the world ocean, a magical ocean-stream that circled the earth at the equator. Sometimes he represented all bodies of salt water, sometimes just the Atlantic ocean. He was a huge, muscular snake man with a beard and horns. Instead of a humanoid lower body he had a snake bottom or in some depictions a fish body. He’s one of the few Primordial Titans (some of the gods kind of belong in both categories) that did not get involved with the Titanomachy.

Tethys was often listed as Oceanus’ consort. She was the daughter of Uranus and Gaia. She was mother to the Nile, the Alpheus, the Maeander, and about three thousand daughters called the Oceanids. Sometimes she and Thalassa or Thetis get swapped around in stories, but Tethys is definitely her own goddess. With the exception of raising Hera, she’s not depicted much in any of the known Greek myths or paintings, but when she is described it’s as an ancient woman. An extremely powerful ancient woman. Once, just to make Hera happy, she rearranged the constellations by sheer force of will so that Ursa Major and Minor never dipped below the horizon. One of the moons of Saturn is named for her, as is the preheistoric ocean.

Ophion and Eurynome don’t factor into many versions of the Greek myths, but in a few they ruled the universe before Cronus and Rhea. Eurynome was a daughter of Oceanus and Ophion was a giant. They fought against Cronus and Rhea and lost.

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Hydros was the god of primordial waters. He came from Chaos alongside Thesis (creation) and mud. The primordial mud became Gaia she and Hydros gave birth to Chronos and Ananke. Hydros wasn’t water in the same sense that Pontos was. He was the fresh-water river that encircled the earch and provided water for the gods.

Pontus was the son of Gaia, sometimes son of Chaos, sometimes Aether, and sometimes “created without coupling.” He was the first sea-god, and as a primordial he WAS the sea.

He paired with Gaia to have Nereus, the old man of the sea, Thaumas (the awe/wonder of the sea), Phorcys, Ceto, Eurybia, and Thalassa, the sea goddess. With Thalassa, he created all sea life, Halia, and the Telchines.

Thalassa is sometimes considered the daughter of Aether and Hemera. Sometimes she’s the mother of Aphrodite. Since Thalassa is also the sea, when Aphrodite came from the sea (Thalassa) after Uranus lost his nether bits.

Thalassa makes an appearance In Aesop’s Fables when a farmer sees a ship full of people sink into the ocean. The farmer got upset and started cursing the sea for its cruelty and to his utter shock a woman made of sea-water emerged from the ocean and laid into him for spreading mean stories about her. Without wind, the ocean would be calm and serene so really, it’s out of her control.

Nereus, the old man of the sea, was a Titan, so we’ll deal with him in another set of mythology Mondays. Thaumas married an Oceanid named Electra and gave birth to the Harpies, Iris, the divine messenger and goddess of rainbows, and Arke, the shadow of the rainbow.

Phorcys was the primordial god of the deep sea and all its dangers. His wife/sister was Ceto, goddess of large marine life and sea monsters, and together the two produced a bunch of fearsome monsters called the Phorcydes, the Hesperides, the Gorgons, Graeae, Thoosa, Scylla, Echidna, and Laydon.

Eurybia, primordial goddess of the sea’s force, was known for having a heart of flint and for controlling the rise and fall of constellations, seasonal weather, and the winds. She married the Titan Crius and gave birth to Astraeus, Perses, and Pallas. Her grandchildren all had power over the sea. They included the Anemoi (Winds), the Astra (Stars), Hekate (Witchraft), Selene (the Moon), Nike (Victory), Bia (Force), Kratos (Power), Zelos (Rivalry) (thank you theoi) .

Proteus was a primordial sea god of oceanic rivers. The children of Proteus, include Eidothea, Polygonus and Telegonus, (the latter two were both killed by Heracles)

He can see the future, but in order to hear it you have to catch the shape-shifting deity. In the Odyssey, Menelaus learned that if he could capture Proteus, then Menelaus could force Proteus to reveal which of the gods he had offended, and how he could get them to lay off so he could go home. Proteus’ daughter told Menelaus where he slept (with the seals, apparently) so Menelaus snuck up on him while he was sleeping and grabbed hold of the primordial god. Proteus shifted from lion, to serpent, to leopard, to pig, to water and then to a tree, but Menelaus didn’t let go. Defeated, Proteus told Menelaus the fates of everyone else on the way home from the war.

Another myth involving Proteus’ shape shifting took place when all of Aristaeus’ (son of Apollo) bees died. Since Ancient Greece took mass dying of bees much more seriously than we do now for some reason, Aristaeus got a hold of Proteus to learn how to prevent more bees from dying. He held on through all the changes and Proteus finally told him the gods had struck down his bees because he was responsible for the death of Eurydice (Orpheus’ wife, on her wedding day, Aristaeus decided he wanted to rape her, so he chased her through the woods where she was bitten by a snake and died.) He sacrificed to the gods, said he was sorry, and all the bees lived happily ever after.

Hemera (day) and Aether (light) were two of the children of Nyx and Erebus, though some versions of the myth claim they are the children of Chaos instead, or the children of Nyx and Chronos or jut Chronos. They don’t appear in a lot of myths because while you might hear these gods referred to as personified concepts, they’re not like other gods down the line. Hemera WAS day, not the goddess of daytime. She didn’t just represent her element, she was that element, and concepts like day and light are kind of hard to come up with active stories about.

One thing that is known is that Hemera didn’t spend a lot of time with her mom, the two would greet each other at the end of every night when Nyx returned home and Hemera was on her way out the door.

Aether is called the god of light or brightness, but that’s kind of a misnomer in the sense that a modern person would think of light. Technically he’s the god of the bright, glowing upper air that only gods breathe as opposed to the gross lower air reserved for us mortals. During the night, Nyx separated the flowing divine air from the mortal air with a veil of mist (which makes me think of Mistborn). During the day, Hemera dispels the mist so man can see the divine light of the gods.

Being a very powerful divine couple that can’t perform an active role in most myths reduces gods to impressive names to throw around in divine lineages. Hemera and Aether might have been parents to Thalassa (a primordial sea goddess), or they might have been parents to Thalassa, Uranus, and Gaia. Or Aether might have hooked up with Gaia too and produced “Grief, Deceit, Wrath, Lamentation, Falsehood, Oath, Vengeance, Intemperance, Altercation, Forgetfulness, Sloth, Fear, Pride, Incest, Combat, Ocean, Themis, Tartarus, Pontus; and the Titans, Briareus, Gyges, Steropes, Atlas, Hyperion, and Polus, Saturn, Ops, Moneta, Dione; and three Furies – namely, Alecto, Megaera, Tisiphone.” (thanks Theoi.)

Busy man.

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Nyx’s children occupied a heavy percentage of Pandora’s Box. Since they came from a god they’re gods but the myths often refer to them as spirits of whichever concept they personify.

Momus was the spirit of mockery, satire, and unfair blame or criticism. He was not popular among the other gods and his mockery got him banished from Olympus.

According to Aesop’s Fables, Zeus, Poseidon, and Athena were arguing over who could make the very best good thing (because these competitions always go so well). Zeus made man, Athena made homes for men, and Poseidon broke the theme entirely by making a bull. They asked Momus to judge, but Momus is a nitpicky jerk, so he found fault with all the creations. According to Momus the Moron, Bulls should have eyes under their horns so they can aim where they gouge. Men need windows to their hearts. And the home should have been mobile. Infuriated with this condescending manner, the gods in question stopped bickering long enough to throw Momus off the mountain.

In other sources, he mocked Hephaestus for the poor design of the human body, picked on Aphrodite for being chatty (though other sources say Aphrodite is the only being he never found fault with), and he mocked Zeus for…being a womanizing POS (I kind of like Momus for that).

Momus gets mentions all throughout literature. He’s referenced in Plato’s Republic, Swift’s Battle of the Books, Thoreau’s Walden, and Sterne’s Tristram Shandy. I imagine they reference this god in particular to impress with their knowledge of otherwise obscure Greek deities. Well that and satire was kind of their specialty.

Momus also inspired the Knights of Momus, a Mardi Gras society of note.

Also in the box was Apate, the spirit of deception; Philotes, the spirit of affection (though the jury is still out on whether her brand of affection focused more on friendship or sex. Myths contradict where she is concerned); Oizys, the spirit of misery; and Geras, the spirit of old age. It looks like there were a ton of awesome myths about him, but they’ve all been lost to time. Irony.

Nyx also gave birth to a class of vampiric “death-fates” called the Keres. Their kind of like Valkyries only evil. These dark spirits fed off the wounded and dying on battlefields. The wounded weren’t granted a quick merciful death, either. First the soldier’s souls would be ripped free from their body, then spirits would fight over the corpse with gnashing and tearing teeth. Ouch. A few of the stronger Keres got their own names. There’s Anaplekte (quick, painful death); Akhlys (mist of death); Nosos (disease); Ker (destruction); and Stygere (hateful).

That’s the last of Nyx’s children and the end of the box. All that was left inside after all these fun deities escaped was Hope.

Eris was the god of strife, chaos, and discord. She is the daughter of Nyx, and sometimes Erebus, sometimes Cronus. Eris is the major deity behind Discordianism. Eris and Enyo, a younger goddess of war, are sometimes referred to interchangeably.

Eris is most famous for setting the Trojan War into motion. She was not invited to the wedding of Peleus and Thetis, so she showed up anyway in a very Malificent move, bearing the gift of a golden apple. The gift, she explained, was intended for the most beautiful goddess in attendance. Hera, Athena, and Aphrodite immediately began bickering over the apple, and in the end Paris was chosen to judge the divine beauty contest. Each goddess tried to bribe him, and Aphrodite, who promised him the most beautiful mortal woman on earth, Helen of Troy, won. Unfortunately, Helen was not yet of Troy, she was married to Menalaus, so when Paris kidnapped her he started the Trojan War.

The timing in the myth makes little sense. Peleus and Thetis would later give birth to Achilles, a major player in the Trojan War, so I’m not really sure how old the most beautiful woman in the world was at this point, or even if she or Paris should have technically been alive. But that’s neither here nor there.

Eris also played a major part in the love story of Polytekhnos and Aedon. The two claimed their love for one another rivaled Hera and Zeus’. Infuriated with the comparison, Hera sent Eris to make trouble. Both the humans were happily, and healthily pursuing their own interests and not hurting anyone. Polytekhnos was working on a chariot board and Aedon was weaving. Eris goaded them into a competition by proclaiming that whoever finished last would have to give the other a female servant.

Friendly competition, right?

Nope. Eris is VERY good at sowing discord.

Aedon finished first. Pride wounded, Polytekhnos retaliated by raping his wife’s sister, disguising her, and presenting her to his wife as her slave. Aedon, surprise surprise, recognized her sister and got pissed. So she chopped up Polytekhnos’ son and fed him to her husband. The gods looked down on the entire situation, jaws dropping, and no doubt wondering what the ever-loving heck had happened and turned the whole lot of humans involved into birds so they wouldn’t have to deal with them anymore.

Eris went on to produce the Kakodaimones. The kakodaimones were a set of evil spirits, specifically: Ponos (Toil), Lethe (Forgetfulness), Limos (Starvation), the Algea (Pains/weeping), the Hysminai (Fightings), the Makhai (Battles), the Phonoi (Murders), the Androktasiai (Man-slaughters), the Neikea (Quarrels), the Pseudo-Logoi (Lies), the Amphilogiai (Disputes), Dysnomia (Lawlessness), Ate (Ruin), and Horkos (Oath). (Thank you Theoi.)

Horkos, by the way, was only dangerous to oath breakers.

In Aesop’s fables, Eris and Hercules duke it out, kind of. Herc is just walking along when he sees a random apple on the ground and in true Herc fashion decides to smash it. Every time he smashes it, the apple doubles in size until the moral of the story, this time named Athena, walks in and tells Herc to ignore it. Strife only grows when you fight it.

Eris also drove an entire town of women to the murder of their husbands. She was on the wrong side of the Gigantomachy. She escorted Typhon into battle against Zeus.

Eris is like a dog with a bone. She doesn’t stop fighting or arguing until long after the conflict should have ended. She’s described in a variety of ways, but the description “blood soaked hair” stuck with me more than most. Not a goddess you want to end up on the wrong side of.

Nemesis was the goddess of revenge who sometimes went by Adrasteia. But it’s important to note she’s not evil. She’s balance. When someone has too much good fortune, she knocks them off their pedestal. When they commit a wrong, she sees that the pain they inflicted on others is restored to them full-fold.

She is either the daughter of Nyx alone, Nyx and Erebus, or a child of Oceanus, or even a daughter of Zeus. In some versions of the myths, she is also the mother of Helen of Troy and Castor and Pollux. In this lesser known version, she attempts to escape Zeus’ advances by turning into a goose, instead, Zeus turns into a swan and rapes her anyway. She lays three eggs, but before they can hatch she’s startled off by a random shepherd, who gives the eggs to Leda. They hatch and are, surprise, people, and the story continues from there unchanged.

Nemesis also introduced Narcissus to his reflection, killed a girl that offended Artemis, and set up the rape of a girl named Nikaia for killing Hymnos.

In some myths she hooks up with Tartarus and gives birth to the four Telchines: Aktaios, Megalesios, Ormenos and Lykos. In some versions there are nine of them, and in some versions they aren’t Nemesis’ offspring at all. The Telchines were the first inhabitants of the island of Rhodes. The Telchines were very skilled metal workers and made weapons for the gods. They were so good, they were sometimes worshipped themselves. They may have raised Poseidon or Zeus when Rhea had to hide them. They controlled wet weather and could shapeshift into any form they wanted. The Olympians eventually destroyed them because they created this mixture of Stygian water (water from the Styx) and sulfur that could destroy plants and animals.

You know how in a LOT of Greek myths the bad guys learn this horrible prophecy of their death by some small child and go out of their way to kill said small child, but actually end up forging small child into big hero? That’s thanks to Moros, child of the night (Nyx). Moros is the personification of doom, specifically the sense of impending doom that leads men to take drastic actions that actually lead them to their doomed fate. Also, he’s the god of depression. He was balanced by the spirit of hope, Elpis, the only good thing in Pandora’s box.

Moros often worked through the Oneiroi, the personification of dreams. But what about Morpheus you ask? Well, he’s sometimes described as one of the Oneiroi or even the leaders of the Oneiroi. See, the Oneiroi were not humanoid. Often described as black winged demons, or bat like creatures, the Oneiroi would pour out of Erebos, the land of eternal darkness beyond the rising sun in the dark of the night. The Oneiroi passed through one of two gates (pylai). The first of these, made of horn, was the source of the prophetic god-sent dreams, while the other, constructed of ivory, was the source of dreams which were false and without meaning. The term for nightmare was melas oneiros or the black dream, which makes me think of the Oni from teen-wolf, but that’s Japanese mythology.

There were three notable Oneiroi. Morpheus, who would appear as a man in the dreams of kings and could present human images; Icelos or Phobetor, who could grant visions of animals; and Phantasos, who could bring images of elements.

The Oneiroi were either the son of Nyx alone, Nyx and Erebus, Gaia, or a son of Hypnos. In the Illiad, Oneiroi is sent by Zeus to visit the dreams of Agamemnon to plant the seeds of war. So, basically, the Trojan War began thanks to inception.